Entailing Confusion in Communication

Welcome to this life, swarming with sarcasm and elusive moments.

As "decent" human beings we derive from being polite, forgiving, and understanding. But frankly, half the time we end up more confused than we were before.

I, as I'm sure you as well, have been victims and convicts of unclearly answering a question.

There is a five step process:

Step one: A question is posed
Step two: A long, tedious, completely uninformative, and ambiguous answer is given.
Step three: The person answering the question says, "Does/did that answer your question?"
Step four:Out of politeness and sheer bewilderment, with a perplexed face and a risen brow, the questioner answers, "..Yes."
Step five: In addition to a wasted 2 minutes and 34 seconds, the questioner leaves additionally confused and still, without an answer.

We leave these type of situations frustrated and thinking to ourselves,
"Well thanks professor, you teach the subject and couldn't even answer my question!" or
"No, Mr. Computer guy on the phone, I did not know the AJaX adds asynchronous communication between the browser and Web site via either XML or JSON to achieve performance that often rivals desktop applications, but thanks anyway."

Another form of the confusing question process is what I like to call the "AAA problem", Accent Answering Ability problem.

I am in no way opposed to immigration or creating job opportunities for those striving to obtain the so-called, "The American Dream", but at times I wish freetranslator.com had a heavy accent translation.

Ever just feel like an ass because you have to say, "What?" five times in a row because you can't tell whether or not your total is $5.79 or $9.69?? Guilty. Sometimes I feel like I should just give them a $10 and tell them to keep the change.

This problem doesn't always come from accents, saying, "What?" more than two times in a row is an indication there is something wrong with the communication:
- When you turn your back and try to say something, all I hear is mumble, mumble, mumble. And no, getting half way through the sentence then turning around again isn't any better.
- Slow down, there is no contest to see who can speak the quickest. The conversation will be over quicker if I don't have to say, "What?" three times to hear you clearly.
- In reverse, stop texting for 30 seconds and you won't have to say, "What?" three times because you couldn’t focus.

We communicate in thousands of ways, therefore, there are thousands of ways to be confused.

I can safely guarantee if you say "Um" or "Like" every other word, not a damn person will listen to a word you say.

Dear white boy,
Your lack of grammar and childish vocabulary doesn't make you tough or cool, just easier to take less serious. Your sentence structure, or lack thereof, confuses more than half the population who reads them. Webster’s Dictionary doesn't take suggestions for definition revision, keep to the system.
Sincerely,
Society

Sarcasm, the number one awkward moment contributor.

Sarcasm within groups of friends/family:

- Things can be taken too far
- You catch on to it quickly
- You know when to laugh
- Nobody will judge you

Sarcasm within groups of people you don't know/just met:

- People may think you're an ass/sexual harasser
- You will be judged
- There will be several moments of awkward silences, laughs, and looks
- You have the power to confuse people (e.g. changing your name, where you live, and your entire life history) and no one will know.

There will always be that kid who crosses the line. In the circle of jokes and sarcastic remarks, there's that kid that makes the room go silent or force everyone to go, "Oooooh.." and shake their heads in a, 'you should have stopped while you were ahead' way.

Sarcasm is an incredibly powerful, but dangerous communicating tool. The blonde may believe it, but the brunette may get her feelings hurt, and the red head may think you're on drugs.

They should have warning labels on cell phones and Facebook, WARNING: Using sarcasm via this device may result in confusion, dispute, and disbelief. Use at your own risk.

In present day 2011, new technologies combined with idiotic and/or uneducated communicators it is nearly impossible to go about a day without using the word, "What?" and the awkward, 'am I supposed to laugh' moments.

In the world of communication, good luck with foreign, unhelpful, mumbling, sadistic members of society.

Stop & Smell the Roses

Just like you splatter paint on your paper
I splatter these words upon this page
tuck them away and save them for later.
I told them to stop, and "Please, smell these roses?"
"It's winter" they told me
and stuck up their noses.
A simple question, yet they pose levity.
I wish they'd fall off the earth,
no thanks to gravity.
In the end
they'll be victims of resignation.
I'll shrug my shoulders and sniff my roses
all out of direct retaliation.
Living in a plain and colorless world
they plead to be relieved of the merciless pit.
No ropes by my side, holding one end of my rose, I call down, "grab hold".
Across the street I hear them say
"Sir, would you stop and smell my roses?"
The man said no, turned, and walked vainly away.
Shaking their head
they explained to each other
"Just as we learned, one day he'll see he should have stopped and smelled them instead".

Entailing 2010

Confetti flies and pots hit pans as December 31 becomes January 1.

New Years is a (if not the most) motivational holiday. Why? Because it's free.

In a matter of 24 hours you can change yourself, so to speak. We set goals to become who we want to be or limitations to get rid of who don't want to be.

New Years is an opportunity to rid the wrongs you've done, the regrets you posses, the memories you'd like to forget. Because the clock turns 12 a.m., we can wipe our slates clean and start something new.

Realistically, a new number on the calendar doesn't erase anything. The things we most want to forget are the things that are virtually impossible to do so.

But we can try. Without some sort of motivation, more than half of us wouldn't try again, so why not throw in a holiday to raise the bar?

New Years isn't necessarily a challenge to look forward, but an opportunity to look back.

Last 12/31, who were you? And this year, same question. The answer to both questions is most likely different.

What/who was your..

Political perspective?
Pick for superbowl champion?
Drink of choice?
Income
Religious Belief
Best friend
Significant other
Enemy
Role model
Budget
Living situation

Chances are more than one of these has changed, therefore, you have changed.

In the last year, who has kicked you to the ground? And who has picked you up?

Thank the people who made you who you are today. Not just the ones who helped you do good; you are never picked up if haven't fallen.

The past 365 days have not gone without fault nor without happiness. Appreciate what you earned and what you were given, be humble in what you gave.

New Years resolutions do not have a 90 day limit; If you haven't succeeded right away, try again.
- If you had that piece of cake on day 3 of your new diet, start over.
- If you went shopping the day after you got your paycheck, start saving and do better.
- Can't make amends with your ex, its ok, sleep on it, tomorrow is a new day.

News Years resolutions are not perishable, they do not have an expiration date.

Although, don't just wait for the new "year" to make a change. Every day is a new "day". The clock changes from 11:59 to 12:00 every night, the bite sized New Years, don't underestimate the power and opportunity of a new day.

In order to achieve any goal, you must

First: Believe in yourself. Edison would have never created the light bulb if he didn't believe it could be done.
Second: Be realistic. It's obvious you can't literally, "reach for the stars", its more like.. reach for the top cabinet. Set goals for yourself you can actually achieve.
Third: Forgive yourself. This is a prerequisite. We all make mistakes but if you cannot forgive yourself, you will be stuck in a rut you can't get out of. If you're stuck you simply cannot move forward.
Fourth: Positive influences. Surround yourself with people who support and help you achieve your goals. If you're trying to lose weight, it's probably unwise to be friends with a cake decorator. Understand?
Fifth: Embrace failure. Goals are clearly things you are not comfortable with or have not done before. Nothing is right the first time around, but that doesn't mean they're not meant to be or achievable.

As you end the year, give it a high five and a pat on the back on the way out. Say your thank yous and your goodbye's.

Take a deep breath and welcome the new year. Introduce yourself, and begin a flourishing relationship.

So raise your glass and make a toast, hello 2011.

Entailing Fight

It's like a light switch. Something inside you ignites.

You can go on the field/court and shoot the ball and go one-on-one against your opponent. But you have to want to be there, you have to want the game.

If you don't have passion you have nothing.

Every coach and athlete knows you have to have passion to win.

But every human fails to realize you have to have passion to live; to do anything.

Everyone has goals, and going through the motions has never and will never get you where you want to be. Make the necessary sacrifices, go the necessary distance; go beyond the requirements.

If nothing in your life drives you, your life is probably boring. The most joyful moments are when we finally, metaphorically, flip off the challenges that have been laughing in our faces.

The easiest fuel to feed off of, "You can't do it"... Says who?

Everyday society challenges us to backdown and surrender, waving a white flag.

Stand up, look em' in the eye, and begin shooting; ammo of your choice.

Beat the other team, beat the record, beat cancer, beat the odds. Whatever you do, don't beat yourself.

Fight in the ring, fight for that girl, fight for your life. Whatever you do, don't stop fighting.

A life without passion is like bread without butter (or whatever topping you prefer). It can keep you alive, but its worthless and boring until you add something to it; once you experience that new sensation, it's hard to ever go back to plain bread again.

Prioritize and reflect. Are the things you're fighting for, really worth fighting for?

What things, if stopped fighting for, could you/could you not afford to lose?

The fight itself..

If what you were fighting for was easy, it wouldnt be fought over, it would be equally distributed among individuals.

Obstacles aren't signs from God to give up, it's a challenge to keep going.

Sacrifice sleep for it. Sweat for it. Consume your mind with it. Get after it. Don't stop until you get it; once you do, hold on it and never let it go.

Just as baking bread requires yeast, achieving anything in life requires passion. Without either of them, the turn out will never be as you want it.

Find one thing, or many for that matter, and devote your being to it. Achievements satisfy far more than failures hinder. Failures are just a special ingredient. They make it so much better when you finally succeed.

Ready. Set. Go.

Prince Charming, is he real?

Every little girl grows up hoping that prince charming will sweep her off her feet and fall head over heals in love.

That same little girl ends up disappointed every time a boy breaks her heart.

Every girl rolls her eyes at her dad and older brother when they hassle & tell her not to date the boys she brings over.

That same girl ends up wishing she would have listened.

Every dad tells her daughter he will cry when he walks down the isle on her wedding day.

His daughter never believes it til' he actually does.

Every teenage girl grows up, dates a million and one boys, thinking everyone is the boy she's destined to be with. Without fail, he ends up being a scum bag, cheater, or gay

Naturally, she moves on, or declares she's going lesbian.

But then, there's that one. The one who changes everything.

She begins to doodle all over her homework, "Mrs. (insert name)" accompanied by hearts and swirls.

Everything she is is compromised:

- Friends
- Schoolwork
- Likes
- Dislikes
- Hobbies
- etc.etc.etc.

The sad thing is, he never does the same, but it doesn't matter because she loves him.

As long as I've written, I've avoided the topic of love because I feel it's an entirely broad, cliche, and untouchable subject. But, here it goes..

When a girl is in love:

- Being ditched by her friends isn't so bad anymore
- The world could be on fire & she'd be fine, but if she got in a fight with him, she'd cry
- A minimum of 85% of what she thinks about involves him.
- She would genuinely give up everything she has for him.
- She'll take the blame, just because
- She wants other guys to ask if she has a boyfriend, just so she can say yes
- She'll get mad at him, but it lasts a max. of 10 seconds
- Talking to him never gets old
- He can hurt/take advantage of her, but she'll pretend it's ok and not happening

Sadly the list could go on.

A common phrase, "You complete me", How true that phrase is..

Yes.. Because you won't do the dishes I will. Yes.. Because you won't make the bed I will.

Make sense?

But in reality, love makes us do stupid (or not stupid depending on how you look at it) things; Some people are just more comfortable with it than others. Some people are more willing to make sacrfices.

Every relationship requires some sort of sacrifice, whether it be from sacrificing the pillow at night to taking/making a phone call that interupts a guys/girls night out.

The thing about (most) girls: They will make all the sacrifices to keep the relationship.

Deep down she wants him to buy her flowers, call her when he's with his friends, watch gossip girl with her, and do all the cheesy things we see in chick flicks. But when it comes down to it, to her, nothing matters but his love, and thats enough for her.

Every girl, or victim for that matter, knows the difference between what she really wants to say and start a fight, and what will keep the relationship peaceful and ideal.

No guy wants a clingy girlfriend, so she'll pretend she doesn't miss him. She'll pretend she doesn't care that slutty girls are coming on to him. When he forgets to call she'll tell him it's fine, and pretend she hadn't been frantically thinking about what she did done wrong.

No guy wants to be whipped and get shit from his friends, so she won't call him when he's with his friends even though she has something to tell him. She'll tell him he doesn't have to visit her when she's sick or come to her game. She'll tell him a guys night sounds great, and forget about the plans she spent all day thinking about.

Even though half the time a girl spends the time pretending she doesn't care, or having secret heart attacks over something, she genuinely wants the best for her boy. She is genuinely happy for him when he is happy. She is genuinely willing to let things go for the sake of a realtionship.

Reality check for the boys? Possibly.
Confessions of a girl? Most likely.

Every little girl grows up searching for prince charming, but every woman grows old trying to preserve him.