Entailing Confusion in Communication

Welcome to this life, swarming with sarcasm and elusive moments.

As "decent" human beings we derive from being polite, forgiving, and understanding. But frankly, half the time we end up more confused than we were before.

I, as I'm sure you as well, have been victims and convicts of unclearly answering a question.

There is a five step process:

Step one: A question is posed
Step two: A long, tedious, completely uninformative, and ambiguous answer is given.
Step three: The person answering the question says, "Does/did that answer your question?"
Step four:Out of politeness and sheer bewilderment, with a perplexed face and a risen brow, the questioner answers, "..Yes."
Step five: In addition to a wasted 2 minutes and 34 seconds, the questioner leaves additionally confused and still, without an answer.

We leave these type of situations frustrated and thinking to ourselves,
"Well thanks professor, you teach the subject and couldn't even answer my question!" or
"No, Mr. Computer guy on the phone, I did not know the AJaX adds asynchronous communication between the browser and Web site via either XML or JSON to achieve performance that often rivals desktop applications, but thanks anyway."

Another form of the confusing question process is what I like to call the "AAA problem", Accent Answering Ability problem.

I am in no way opposed to immigration or creating job opportunities for those striving to obtain the so-called, "The American Dream", but at times I wish freetranslator.com had a heavy accent translation.

Ever just feel like an ass because you have to say, "What?" five times in a row because you can't tell whether or not your total is $5.79 or $9.69?? Guilty. Sometimes I feel like I should just give them a $10 and tell them to keep the change.

This problem doesn't always come from accents, saying, "What?" more than two times in a row is an indication there is something wrong with the communication:
- When you turn your back and try to say something, all I hear is mumble, mumble, mumble. And no, getting half way through the sentence then turning around again isn't any better.
- Slow down, there is no contest to see who can speak the quickest. The conversation will be over quicker if I don't have to say, "What?" three times to hear you clearly.
- In reverse, stop texting for 30 seconds and you won't have to say, "What?" three times because you couldn’t focus.

We communicate in thousands of ways, therefore, there are thousands of ways to be confused.

I can safely guarantee if you say "Um" or "Like" every other word, not a damn person will listen to a word you say.

Dear white boy,
Your lack of grammar and childish vocabulary doesn't make you tough or cool, just easier to take less serious. Your sentence structure, or lack thereof, confuses more than half the population who reads them. Webster’s Dictionary doesn't take suggestions for definition revision, keep to the system.
Sincerely,
Society

Sarcasm, the number one awkward moment contributor.

Sarcasm within groups of friends/family:

- Things can be taken too far
- You catch on to it quickly
- You know when to laugh
- Nobody will judge you

Sarcasm within groups of people you don't know/just met:

- People may think you're an ass/sexual harasser
- You will be judged
- There will be several moments of awkward silences, laughs, and looks
- You have the power to confuse people (e.g. changing your name, where you live, and your entire life history) and no one will know.

There will always be that kid who crosses the line. In the circle of jokes and sarcastic remarks, there's that kid that makes the room go silent or force everyone to go, "Oooooh.." and shake their heads in a, 'you should have stopped while you were ahead' way.

Sarcasm is an incredibly powerful, but dangerous communicating tool. The blonde may believe it, but the brunette may get her feelings hurt, and the red head may think you're on drugs.

They should have warning labels on cell phones and Facebook, WARNING: Using sarcasm via this device may result in confusion, dispute, and disbelief. Use at your own risk.

In present day 2011, new technologies combined with idiotic and/or uneducated communicators it is nearly impossible to go about a day without using the word, "What?" and the awkward, 'am I supposed to laugh' moments.

In the world of communication, good luck with foreign, unhelpful, mumbling, sadistic members of society.

Stop & Smell the Roses

Just like you splatter paint on your paper
I splatter these words upon this page
tuck them away and save them for later.
I told them to stop, and "Please, smell these roses?"
"It's winter" they told me
and stuck up their noses.
A simple question, yet they pose levity.
I wish they'd fall off the earth,
no thanks to gravity.
In the end
they'll be victims of resignation.
I'll shrug my shoulders and sniff my roses
all out of direct retaliation.
Living in a plain and colorless world
they plead to be relieved of the merciless pit.
No ropes by my side, holding one end of my rose, I call down, "grab hold".
Across the street I hear them say
"Sir, would you stop and smell my roses?"
The man said no, turned, and walked vainly away.
Shaking their head
they explained to each other
"Just as we learned, one day he'll see he should have stopped and smelled them instead".