It's like a light switch. Something inside you ignites.
You can go on the field/court and shoot the ball and go one-on-one against your opponent. But you have to want to be there, you have to want the game.
If you don't have passion you have nothing.
Every coach and athlete knows you have to have passion to win.
But every human fails to realize you have to have passion to live; to do anything.
Everyone has goals, and going through the motions has never and will never get you where you want to be. Make the necessary sacrifices, go the necessary distance; go beyond the requirements.
If nothing in your life drives you, your life is probably boring. The most joyful moments are when we finally, metaphorically, flip off the challenges that have been laughing in our faces.
The easiest fuel to feed off of, "You can't do it"... Says who?
Everyday society challenges us to backdown and surrender, waving a white flag.
Stand up, look em' in the eye, and begin shooting; ammo of your choice.
Beat the other team, beat the record, beat cancer, beat the odds. Whatever you do, don't beat yourself.
Fight in the ring, fight for that girl, fight for your life. Whatever you do, don't stop fighting.
A life without passion is like bread without butter (or whatever topping you prefer). It can keep you alive, but its worthless and boring until you add something to it; once you experience that new sensation, it's hard to ever go back to plain bread again.
Prioritize and reflect. Are the things you're fighting for, really worth fighting for?
What things, if stopped fighting for, could you/could you not afford to lose?
The fight itself..
If what you were fighting for was easy, it wouldnt be fought over, it would be equally distributed among individuals.
Obstacles aren't signs from God to give up, it's a challenge to keep going.
Sacrifice sleep for it. Sweat for it. Consume your mind with it. Get after it. Don't stop until you get it; once you do, hold on it and never let it go.
Just as baking bread requires yeast, achieving anything in life requires passion. Without either of them, the turn out will never be as you want it.
Find one thing, or many for that matter, and devote your being to it. Achievements satisfy far more than failures hinder. Failures are just a special ingredient. They make it so much better when you finally succeed.
Ready. Set. Go.
12.04.2010
11.06.2010
Prince Charming, is he real?
Every little girl grows up hoping that prince charming will sweep her off her feet and fall head over heals in love.
That same little girl ends up disappointed every time a boy breaks her heart.
Every girl rolls her eyes at her dad and older brother when they hassle & tell her not to date the boys she brings over.
That same girl ends up wishing she would have listened.
Every dad tells her daughter he will cry when he walks down the isle on her wedding day.
His daughter never believes it til' he actually does.
Every teenage girl grows up, dates a million and one boys, thinking everyone is the boy she's destined to be with. Without fail, he ends up being a scum bag, cheater, or gay
Naturally, she moves on, or declares she's going lesbian.
But then, there's that one. The one who changes everything.
She begins to doodle all over her homework, "Mrs. (insert name)" accompanied by hearts and swirls.
Everything she is is compromised:
The sad thing is, he never does the same, but it doesn't matter because she loves him.
As long as I've written, I've avoided the topic of love because I feel it's an entirely broad, cliche, and untouchable subject. But, here it goes..
When a girl is in love:
Sadly the list could go on.
A common phrase, "You complete me", How true that phrase is..
Yes.. Because you won't do the dishes I will. Yes.. Because you won't make the bed I will.
Make sense?
But in reality, love makes us do stupid (or not stupid depending on how you look at it) things; Some people are just more comfortable with it than others. Some people are more willing to make sacrfices.
Every relationship requires some sort of sacrifice, whether it be from sacrificing the pillow at night to taking/making a phone call that interupts a guys/girls night out.
The thing about (most) girls: They will make all the sacrifices to keep the relationship.
Deep down she wants him to buy her flowers, call her when he's with his friends, watch gossip girl with her, and do all the cheesy things we see in chick flicks. But when it comes down to it, to her, nothing matters but his love, and thats enough for her.
Every girl, or victim for that matter, knows the difference between what she really wants to say and start a fight, and what will keep the relationship peaceful and ideal.
No guy wants a clingy girlfriend, so she'll pretend she doesn't miss him. She'll pretend she doesn't care that slutty girls are coming on to him. When he forgets to call she'll tell him it's fine, and pretend she hadn't been frantically thinking about what she did done wrong.
No guy wants to be whipped and get shit from his friends, so she won't call him when he's with his friends even though she has something to tell him. She'll tell him he doesn't have to visit her when she's sick or come to her game. She'll tell him a guys night sounds great, and forget about the plans she spent all day thinking about.
Even though half the time a girl spends the time pretending she doesn't care, or having secret heart attacks over something, she genuinely wants the best for her boy. She is genuinely happy for him when he is happy. She is genuinely willing to let things go for the sake of a realtionship.
Reality check for the boys? Possibly.
Confessions of a girl? Most likely.
Every little girl grows up searching for prince charming, but every woman grows old trying to preserve him.
That same little girl ends up disappointed every time a boy breaks her heart.
Every girl rolls her eyes at her dad and older brother when they hassle & tell her not to date the boys she brings over.
That same girl ends up wishing she would have listened.
Every dad tells her daughter he will cry when he walks down the isle on her wedding day.
His daughter never believes it til' he actually does.
Every teenage girl grows up, dates a million and one boys, thinking everyone is the boy she's destined to be with. Without fail, he ends up being a scum bag, cheater, or gay
Naturally, she moves on, or declares she's going lesbian.
But then, there's that one. The one who changes everything.
She begins to doodle all over her homework, "Mrs. (insert name)" accompanied by hearts and swirls.
Everything she is is compromised:
- Friends
- Schoolwork
- Likes
- Dislikes
- Hobbies
- etc.etc.etc.
The sad thing is, he never does the same, but it doesn't matter because she loves him.
As long as I've written, I've avoided the topic of love because I feel it's an entirely broad, cliche, and untouchable subject. But, here it goes..
When a girl is in love:
- Being ditched by her friends isn't so bad anymore
- The world could be on fire & she'd be fine, but if she got in a fight with him, she'd cry
- A minimum of 85% of what she thinks about involves him.
- She would genuinely give up everything she has for him.
- She'll take the blame, just because
- She wants other guys to ask if she has a boyfriend, just so she can say yes
- She'll get mad at him, but it lasts a max. of 10 seconds
- Talking to him never gets old
- He can hurt/take advantage of her, but she'll pretend it's ok and not happening
Sadly the list could go on.
A common phrase, "You complete me", How true that phrase is..
Yes.. Because you won't do the dishes I will. Yes.. Because you won't make the bed I will.
Make sense?
But in reality, love makes us do stupid (or not stupid depending on how you look at it) things; Some people are just more comfortable with it than others. Some people are more willing to make sacrfices.
Every relationship requires some sort of sacrifice, whether it be from sacrificing the pillow at night to taking/making a phone call that interupts a guys/girls night out.
The thing about (most) girls: They will make all the sacrifices to keep the relationship.
Deep down she wants him to buy her flowers, call her when he's with his friends, watch gossip girl with her, and do all the cheesy things we see in chick flicks. But when it comes down to it, to her, nothing matters but his love, and thats enough for her.
Every girl, or victim for that matter, knows the difference between what she really wants to say and start a fight, and what will keep the relationship peaceful and ideal.
No guy wants a clingy girlfriend, so she'll pretend she doesn't miss him. She'll pretend she doesn't care that slutty girls are coming on to him. When he forgets to call she'll tell him it's fine, and pretend she hadn't been frantically thinking about what she did done wrong.
No guy wants to be whipped and get shit from his friends, so she won't call him when he's with his friends even though she has something to tell him. She'll tell him he doesn't have to visit her when she's sick or come to her game. She'll tell him a guys night sounds great, and forget about the plans she spent all day thinking about.
Even though half the time a girl spends the time pretending she doesn't care, or having secret heart attacks over something, she genuinely wants the best for her boy. She is genuinely happy for him when he is happy. She is genuinely willing to let things go for the sake of a realtionship.
Reality check for the boys? Possibly.
Confessions of a girl? Most likely.
Every little girl grows up searching for prince charming, but every woman grows old trying to preserve him.
10.27.2010
What are you eating?
"For the sake of a little flesh we deprive them of sun, of light, of the duration of life to which they are entitled by birth and being" - Plutarch
How many times a week do you run through the Mcdonalds or Wendy's drive through to grab a quick hamburger on your way to work or school?
The average American eats three hamburgers and three-four orders of fries each week (Schlosser). Roughly $10-15 a week turns into $120-150 dollars a year. Times that average by 30 years and it comes out to about $4,500. Times is by 50 years and it's $7,500.
What could you do with $4,500? Take a family trip to Hawaii maybe? What about $7,500? Maybe purchasing a car, well probably a used on, but a car nonetheless.
What exactly are we paying for? Not just a slice of beef between two buns.
One hamburger isn't just one cow, it's Betsy and her entire family tree.
In slaughter houses 22 million animals are slaughtered daily (Goldstein 46) to fuel the traditional American diet of which are given growth hormones and contaminated feed; Remains of horses, pigs and poultry (Schlosser).
You try telling Bobby the chicken he played with earlier is the same one Betsy just ate, who will later end up on his plate. That'll keep him smiling.
American Beef Associations constantly reassure it's buyers hormone injection is safe and it won't end up in our food. Well if that's the case, why have other countries banned to use of hormone growth injections? What's not being told?
A trip to the doctor leaves you with direction to eat more fruits and vegetables. And no, the strip of lettuce on your cheeseburger does not count. The doctor informs you of your high cholesterol and increased blood pressure. Eating a bowl of Cheerios's won't do the job.
Vegetarians are statistically proven to have lower cholesterol and blood pressure and far less likely to be obese (Goldstein 46). Not only health benefits, but vegetarians live about seven years longer than meat eaters and vegans live about 15 years longer.
No, not only you hamburgers, hot dogs, and chicken contain animal products. Jell-o's, some yogurts and ice creams contain gelatin; The hides and bones from pigs and cows (Goldstein 90). Even your french fries are cooked in "animals products" for flavoring. McDonalds used to fry their fries in beef tallow, giving them "more saturated fat per ounce than its burgers" (Schlosser).
In Eric Schlosser's Fast Food Nation he discovers some secrets in fast food. Wendy's grilled chicken sandwich actually contains beef extract and the Burger King broiler chicken breast patty that claims to have a 'natural smokey flavor' isn't what it seems:
So when they say smokey, they mean it!
Bill Haw, CEO of one of the largest cattle feedlot operations in the country explain that a slaughterhouse is
One word particularly sticks out in that paragraph; Dehumanizing.
Websters Dictionary defines dehumanizing as: to deprive of human qualities, personality, or spirit .
Slaughter house animals are packed fiercely into the building where they can in-fact hear, smell and see the slaughtering of other animals. Apart from these are typically the young calves and veals that are dragged there because of weakness, for the animals are unfed for a minimum of 24 hours prior to slaughter who show up foaming at the mouth(Schlosser).
Reflecting on some the greatly looked up to men and women of history, not all of them were meat consumers. To those who look down upon and criticize meatless eaters, what would you say to these people?
I am no preacher, nor an activist. I simply challenge you to consider, what are you eating? Or rather, who?
When you pull up to the drive through, what corporation are you fueling by handing over your credit card or ten dollar bill?
Do you believe in the pursuit of life in every one of God's creations or the superiority of one, unnecessarily killing off the rest?
Sources
Happy Cow Compassionate Eating Guide.
Schlosser, Eric. Fast Food Nation. Boston: Houghton Mifflin Complany, 2001.
Goldstein, Mark A.. Controversies in Food and Nutrition. Westport: Greenwood Publishing Group, Inc., 2002.
How many times a week do you run through the Mcdonalds or Wendy's drive through to grab a quick hamburger on your way to work or school?
The average American eats three hamburgers and three-four orders of fries each week (Schlosser). Roughly $10-15 a week turns into $120-150 dollars a year. Times that average by 30 years and it comes out to about $4,500. Times is by 50 years and it's $7,500.
What could you do with $4,500? Take a family trip to Hawaii maybe? What about $7,500? Maybe purchasing a car, well probably a used on, but a car nonetheless.
What exactly are we paying for? Not just a slice of beef between two buns.
One hamburger isn't just one cow, it's Betsy and her entire family tree.
In slaughter houses 22 million animals are slaughtered daily (Goldstein 46) to fuel the traditional American diet of which are given growth hormones and contaminated feed; Remains of horses, pigs and poultry (Schlosser).
You try telling Bobby the chicken he played with earlier is the same one Betsy just ate, who will later end up on his plate. That'll keep him smiling.
American Beef Associations constantly reassure it's buyers hormone injection is safe and it won't end up in our food. Well if that's the case, why have other countries banned to use of hormone growth injections? What's not being told?
A trip to the doctor leaves you with direction to eat more fruits and vegetables. And no, the strip of lettuce on your cheeseburger does not count. The doctor informs you of your high cholesterol and increased blood pressure. Eating a bowl of Cheerios's won't do the job.
Vegetarians are statistically proven to have lower cholesterol and blood pressure and far less likely to be obese (Goldstein 46). Not only health benefits, but vegetarians live about seven years longer than meat eaters and vegans live about 15 years longer.
No, not only you hamburgers, hot dogs, and chicken contain animal products. Jell-o's, some yogurts and ice creams contain gelatin; The hides and bones from pigs and cows (Goldstein 90). Even your french fries are cooked in "animals products" for flavoring. McDonalds used to fry their fries in beef tallow, giving them "more saturated fat per ounce than its burgers" (Schlosser).
In Eric Schlosser's Fast Food Nation he discovers some secrets in fast food. Wendy's grilled chicken sandwich actually contains beef extract and the Burger King broiler chicken breast patty that claims to have a 'natural smokey flavor' isn't what it seems:
"Red Arrow Products Company manufactures natural smoke flavor by charring sawdust and capturing the aroma chemicals released into the air. Then the firm turns this smoke into liquid with a solvent" (Schlosser: 128)
So when they say smokey, they mean it!
Bill Haw, CEO of one of the largest cattle feedlot operations in the country explain that a slaughterhouse is
"..not now, nor never will be, a very pretty thing. Animals come there to die, to be eviscerated, to be decapitated, to be de-hided -- and all of those are violent, bloody and difficult things to watch. So your first and foremost impression of at least the initial stages of the packing house are a very violent, very dehumanizing sort of thing"
One word particularly sticks out in that paragraph; Dehumanizing.
Websters Dictionary defines dehumanizing as: to deprive of human qualities, personality, or spirit .
Slaughter house animals are packed fiercely into the building where they can in-fact hear, smell and see the slaughtering of other animals. Apart from these are typically the young calves and veals that are dragged there because of weakness, for the animals are unfed for a minimum of 24 hours prior to slaughter who show up foaming at the mouth(Schlosser).
Reflecting on some the greatly looked up to men and women of history, not all of them were meat consumers. To those who look down upon and criticize meatless eaters, what would you say to these people?
Albert Einstein - Vegetarian, Scientist
Aristotle - Vegetarian, Greek Philosopher
Ed Templeton - Vegan, Professional Skateboarder
Ghandi - Vegetarian, Hindi spiritual leader
George Harrison, John Lennon, Paul McCartney - Vegetarians, Singer/Songwriters of The Beatles
Jason Mraz - Vegan, Musician/Singer
Jean-Jacques Rousseau - Vegetarian, Philosopher
Leonardo da Vinci - Vegetarian, Painter/Inventor
Luke Cummo - Vegan, UFC Fighter
Michael Franti - Vegan, Singer of Spearhead
Mr. Rogers - Vegetarian, TV entertainer
Plato - Vegetarian, Greek Philosopher
Plutarch - Vegetarian, Greek Philosopher
Ralph Waldo Emerson - Vegetarian, Writer & Poet
Rosa Parks - Vegetarian, Civil Rights Activist
Sir Isaac Newton - Vegetarian, Physicist
Socrates - Vegetarian, Greek Philosopher
Tom Delonge - Vegetarian, band member of Blink-182
Weird Al Yankovic - Vegan, Comedian & musician
I am no preacher, nor an activist. I simply challenge you to consider, what are you eating? Or rather, who?
When you pull up to the drive through, what corporation are you fueling by handing over your credit card or ten dollar bill?
Do you believe in the pursuit of life in every one of God's creations or the superiority of one, unnecessarily killing off the rest?
Sources
Happy Cow Compassionate Eating Guide.
Schlosser, Eric. Fast Food Nation. Boston: Houghton Mifflin Complany, 2001.
Goldstein, Mark A.. Controversies in Food and Nutrition. Westport: Greenwood Publishing Group, Inc., 2002.
9.06.2010
True Experience
I was asked by a friend to write about life as a new college student and many times to write something new by avid readers.
I cannot express how many times I sat myself down, failing.
I felt all who were reading this wanted to hear the same thing; Life is great, these are going to be the best years yet, a wonderful experience.
Finally, I realized my diffuculty writing was not due to writers block, but simply because I wasn't telling the truth.
Our whole lives are built around these ideas of what high school and college will be like. We paint a picture in our minds of exactly what it will be like.
For 18 years we plan to ditch the town we grew up in and head out on our own to make a name for ourselves, because that's the mature and adventurous thing to do right?
Wrong.
I would be lying if I was to say I haven't learned anything.
I have learned just because we are out of high school, doesn't mean the high school is out of us.
Drama fueled bitches simply won't stop being drama fueled bitches when they recieve a high school diploma, or a college degree for that matter.
We are influenced heavily by those around us, more or less a domino effect, whether or not we are aware it's happening.
If you are talking behind somebody's back it's nearly guarenteed someone is talking about you behind yours.
No body is immune to karma.
When you are surrounded by negative influences, you are challenged wholly to stand up for what you believe in. Whether or not that means speaking up or merely remaining silent and walking away.
It's common to hear, "The friends you meet in college will be the people you will be friends with the rest of your life.." Well, I believe that is not true for everyone.
Meeting friends in college is easy, but what happens when you run out of booze, weed, condoms? Are they still your friends? It's questionable.
I came into this new stage of life completely blinded, and now I see clearer than ever. Although, I didn't realize how blind I was until I began to see.
Now, I can sit myself down and admit I was wrong. I came in with a list of expectations, none of which have been checked off.
My time here has been quite the experience, just not the one I wanted. Not even close.
This is entirely my fault, but therefore it's my responsibility to fix it.
I can beat myself up about staying in every night and being "anti-social", or I can applaud myself for steering clear of the unhealthy lifestyles that lurk around campus. I can commend myself for not compromising my ethics in order to 'fit in', which is a skewed concept anyway.
What have I learned from being here? This life just isn't for me.
I have fallen for the cliche, "Do what makes you happy", and this isn't it.
I have learned to find what makes you happy, you must learn what doesn't.
I may be called a wimp, a baby, a wuss, I may be accused of 'not giving it a chance', although, I'm not the one with my head up my ass.
I am one step closer to success because I have realized what works for me and what does not.
I have discovered little new about myself, but a lot about others. But, I came here to learn, mature and grow as a person, not degrade others around me and definitely not to degrade myself.
We do not learn without experience, and we cannot experience until we take a chance.
Do not feel like a failure if things don't go according to plan. Nothing great was ever achieved the first time around.
Its like learning to bake cookies from scratch; They turn out bad, but you figure out what went wrong, change it, and have at it again until they turn out the way you want them.
Powell, Wyoming just happened to be the wrong ingredient in my batch of cookies.
Therefore, Salt Lake City, see you in December.
I cannot express how many times I sat myself down, failing.
I felt all who were reading this wanted to hear the same thing; Life is great, these are going to be the best years yet, a wonderful experience.
Finally, I realized my diffuculty writing was not due to writers block, but simply because I wasn't telling the truth.
Our whole lives are built around these ideas of what high school and college will be like. We paint a picture in our minds of exactly what it will be like.
For 18 years we plan to ditch the town we grew up in and head out on our own to make a name for ourselves, because that's the mature and adventurous thing to do right?
Wrong.
I would be lying if I was to say I haven't learned anything.
I have learned just because we are out of high school, doesn't mean the high school is out of us.
Drama fueled bitches simply won't stop being drama fueled bitches when they recieve a high school diploma, or a college degree for that matter.
We are influenced heavily by those around us, more or less a domino effect, whether or not we are aware it's happening.
If you are talking behind somebody's back it's nearly guarenteed someone is talking about you behind yours.
No body is immune to karma.
When you are surrounded by negative influences, you are challenged wholly to stand up for what you believe in. Whether or not that means speaking up or merely remaining silent and walking away.
It's common to hear, "The friends you meet in college will be the people you will be friends with the rest of your life.." Well, I believe that is not true for everyone.
Meeting friends in college is easy, but what happens when you run out of booze, weed, condoms? Are they still your friends? It's questionable.
I came into this new stage of life completely blinded, and now I see clearer than ever. Although, I didn't realize how blind I was until I began to see.
Now, I can sit myself down and admit I was wrong. I came in with a list of expectations, none of which have been checked off.
My time here has been quite the experience, just not the one I wanted. Not even close.
This is entirely my fault, but therefore it's my responsibility to fix it.
I can beat myself up about staying in every night and being "anti-social", or I can applaud myself for steering clear of the unhealthy lifestyles that lurk around campus. I can commend myself for not compromising my ethics in order to 'fit in', which is a skewed concept anyway.
What have I learned from being here? This life just isn't for me.
I have fallen for the cliche, "Do what makes you happy", and this isn't it.
I have learned to find what makes you happy, you must learn what doesn't.
I may be called a wimp, a baby, a wuss, I may be accused of 'not giving it a chance', although, I'm not the one with my head up my ass.
I am one step closer to success because I have realized what works for me and what does not.
I have discovered little new about myself, but a lot about others. But, I came here to learn, mature and grow as a person, not degrade others around me and definitely not to degrade myself.
We do not learn without experience, and we cannot experience until we take a chance.
Do not feel like a failure if things don't go according to plan. Nothing great was ever achieved the first time around.
Its like learning to bake cookies from scratch; They turn out bad, but you figure out what went wrong, change it, and have at it again until they turn out the way you want them.
Powell, Wyoming just happened to be the wrong ingredient in my batch of cookies.
Therefore, Salt Lake City, see you in December.
5.25.2010
Entailing Luck
We all know that point when we want to stick our finger to the world and scream screw you.
High school graduation, one week away and I feel bad for those who've yet to learn the real lessons we should know by now.
You know, maybe I'm wrong. Maybe high school students aren't supposed to be familiar with all these things by now, after all, some people never change.
Isn't it crazy how someone can get mad at us for doubting and questioning them and their motives, but sometimes we end up being right? Who then is at fault?
The worst feeling is a metaphorical slap in the face or punch in the stomach, but want to know what the best is? The point when you're in such disbelief, you can't help but laugh, and then the laughter never stops.
Laughter (and a few choice words) comes in handy when a handful amount of people deem it necessary to rub something in your face.
A very dear friend and I have come across a motto we say when we see/hear/experience others stupidity, "Good luck in life". These have become my four favorite words recently.
I've talked before about shrugging your shoulders when something bad happens and distancing yourself from those who hurt you, etc. etc. Although, seldomly did I follow my own advice.
I was consumed with wishful thinking, far too much trust and apparently too high of standards for others. Boy did I learn my lesson. I cannot place blame one any one person specifically, for I am the dictator of the paths I travel and the book-keeper of the emotions I check in and out..
I am convinced we are strangely drawn to others, despite the good or bad it will provide. I believe pain is inevitable, and I believe sometimes we cannot hide it. I believe we hold on to others regardless of the pain because pain is better than nothing.
Today, I choose nothing.
In the few days left of high school, I plan not on making a scene, doing something that will "go down in history", or making myself a legend. When the bell rings the last day, I will walk out, appreciative of what was and accepting of what was not.
When my fingers wrap the diploma, I will neither cry nor cheer, but a sigh of relief. I find I have learned enough and will prosper.
I have found plenty good friends along the way and even a few great ones. Both of which had those who decided not to stick around.
To some, it's a pity things had to end up how they did. But if you don't care, why should I?
They say when one door closes, another one opens. I think they're wrong. I think sometimes, you're just supposed to stop going through doors. Maybe take a stroll outside?
Today, I say goodbye to a few. In six days I will say goodbye to High School and my graduating class. In 68 days I will say goodbye to Utah and all who dwell here.
"She says I'm okay; I'm alright,
Though you have gone from my life
You said that it would,
Now everything should be all right"
-- Flogging Molly
Some people suddenly decide they don't want us in their life, some people replace us. Sometimes we leave people behind, and sometimes we forget them. Often we need to, and often we're meant to. But it's all right, we'll be alright. Good luck in life.
High school graduation, one week away and I feel bad for those who've yet to learn the real lessons we should know by now.
You know that thing consideration?? Try it.
Remember friendship?? It's not a convenience thing.
Lying?? Ya that will get you no where.
Ever heard of integrity? Aquire some.
Do you recall being selfish?? Of course not. You think you've done nothing wrong.
You know, maybe I'm wrong. Maybe high school students aren't supposed to be familiar with all these things by now, after all, some people never change.
Isn't it crazy how someone can get mad at us for doubting and questioning them and their motives, but sometimes we end up being right? Who then is at fault?
The worst feeling is a metaphorical slap in the face or punch in the stomach, but want to know what the best is? The point when you're in such disbelief, you can't help but laugh, and then the laughter never stops.
Laughter (and a few choice words) comes in handy when a handful amount of people deem it necessary to rub something in your face.
A very dear friend and I have come across a motto we say when we see/hear/experience others stupidity, "Good luck in life". These have become my four favorite words recently.
I've talked before about shrugging your shoulders when something bad happens and distancing yourself from those who hurt you, etc. etc. Although, seldomly did I follow my own advice.
I was consumed with wishful thinking, far too much trust and apparently too high of standards for others. Boy did I learn my lesson. I cannot place blame one any one person specifically, for I am the dictator of the paths I travel and the book-keeper of the emotions I check in and out..
I am convinced we are strangely drawn to others, despite the good or bad it will provide. I believe pain is inevitable, and I believe sometimes we cannot hide it. I believe we hold on to others regardless of the pain because pain is better than nothing.
Today, I choose nothing.
In the few days left of high school, I plan not on making a scene, doing something that will "go down in history", or making myself a legend. When the bell rings the last day, I will walk out, appreciative of what was and accepting of what was not.
When my fingers wrap the diploma, I will neither cry nor cheer, but a sigh of relief. I find I have learned enough and will prosper.
I have found plenty good friends along the way and even a few great ones. Both of which had those who decided not to stick around.
To some, it's a pity things had to end up how they did. But if you don't care, why should I?
They say when one door closes, another one opens. I think they're wrong. I think sometimes, you're just supposed to stop going through doors. Maybe take a stroll outside?
Today, I say goodbye to a few. In six days I will say goodbye to High School and my graduating class. In 68 days I will say goodbye to Utah and all who dwell here.
"She says I'm okay; I'm alright,
Though you have gone from my life
You said that it would,
Now everything should be all right"
-- Flogging Molly
Some people suddenly decide they don't want us in their life, some people replace us. Sometimes we leave people behind, and sometimes we forget them. Often we need to, and often we're meant to. But it's all right, we'll be alright. Good luck in life.
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